Looking at the “WhatsApp” pictures of a cow and calf, the
green fields, the dusty roads, the sheep in the pen and the normally very busy
man sitting on a bench and reading a book made me envious. He was in a faraway
land and here I am in the midst of all the action and feeling down, tired and
depressed!
The grass is always greener on the other side! At that
moment in time I chose to ignore the fact that the busy man is away from home,
lonesome and had been able to get away from what he called his “prison”! I
chose to ignore that he has no one to share his day-to-day problems as soon as
he was faced with them, I also chose to ignore that he is a slave to time and
that too in a foreign land!
I have so much to be thankful for; I am still able to see
my baby growing up in front of me before she flies away and he is missing out
on that; I am able to pick up the phone and talk to anyone I choose to without
being worried about meetings and meeting deadlines and labour unrest; I have
the time and the luxury of talking with my older “baby” about her daily
challenges and (hopefully lessen her stress levels)!
Being a true blue confused person, I hate changes in my
lifestyle but I need to move, after a maximum time of four years in one place!
I move to a new place, appreciate its beauty and crib about all the adjustments
I have to make, I also miss all the things in my last place of stay for the
first year of my new place; then it’s time to enjoy the new place fully and cut
my apron strings with the old. Alas! Two years go off very soon and it’s time
for me to yearn for a new place and I blind myself to the good all-around and
just want to move! Sometimes I think I need psychoanalysis!
The other day I was talking with a vegetable vendor near
my house. After the police went on an active rampage and removed all the
hawkers (Illegal) close by, the roads do not have the vegetable vendors but are
filled with cars (I wonder when they will be removed!). To get back to my
conversation with the poor vendor- he had migrated from his native Bihar some
twenty five years back and had set up this shop; just about managing to make
ends meet as he had to pay the regular “hafta” (weekly payoffs!) to the police
and the local “dada” (mafia?); now he had no shop; no regular income; but he
still managed by selling during the dark and continues to pay hafta!
I asked him why he wouldn't move to a new
place. His answer was simple “it’s better to live with the devil you know
rather than face an unknown one”. The maxim is so alien to my mental makeup
that I walked off giving him a sympathetic look rather than empathizing with
him!
When I look around, I see millions who would rather be
unhappy than move from their status-quo lives, they would prefer to live within
their comfort zone rather than venture out to improve their lives!
Someone told me that every time you move, you waste
money, energy and resources. Well! I agree that money, energy and resources are
utilized when you move but the money is used to enrich ourselves not wasted,
energy is spent to carve out a sphere of experience and talking about resources
– the point of the debate is we throw away or give away a lot of things when we
move- I term it as Spring cleaning! Normally things that have not been used for
years are labelled as “junk” and thrown away. These are actually worthless in
terms of utility and only add to the clutter of a house. As feng- shui advises
if you remove the physical clutter, you remove the mental clutter and cleanse
your environment.
After lots of retrospection, hurt (because I expect from
other people) and conversation with the service people (read that as
shopkeepers, sweepers and vendors!) and the cream of society (read that as the
rich and famous) I realize that all of us are like the frog in the well. The
size of the well differs but we think that the world that surrounds us is the
real world, there is nothing beyond it. We have no right to berate anyone
because his vision does not go beyond the gates of his living world just because
we have seen the “world”; neither do we have the right to label someone as a
show- off because he gives examples from all over the world!
“Live and let live” is the line for me today. Don’t know
what tomorrow shall bring but criticizing people is a harmless pastime which
actually is a lovely psychological medicine to keep our spirits up. Like KD in
“Adalat” says “Am I right or am I right?”
