Pause, before Valentine’s Day!

Yesterday in the newspaper, I read John McWhorter say, that it was time for the ubiquitous “Comma” to be interred! According to him there is no loss of clarity if the wee thing is murdered and buried without a befitting burial! Rage engulfed me- remembering the- ifs and buts of the use of comma that we learnt painstakingly from first grade onwards, Oh! Alas! The futile toil of almost seventeen years of formal education and even beyond!

 I am a lover of English language, not because it’s smart but because that’s the only language I know completely (as it possibly as can be). It is of course a vicious circle- I love it because I know it, I know it as I love it! It is ever engulfing, though its rules are rather atrocious, it is fluid and accepting. Over its long history, plenty of words have been welcomed and accepted by it. It will remain the language of the future and will not go the Latin or Sanskrit way. I love it as it allows me to converse with the rest of the world, albeit sometimes using my kind of sign language (which is largely gesticulating!) along with it, but I get by….

Mr. Pico Iyer has given a very interesting view about his love for the comma- he seems to be in love with it as much I am. So the poor cousin of “full stop” does have its share of fans in the world. Where would I be without its little pregnant pauses to give meaning to my private poems? Where would I be without its meaningful breaks to thrust forward my pugnacious arguments? Where would I be without its loud silences to take a break from my stream of consciousness?

I quite agree with him that putting the comma into an early grave will take out the romance and love from the English language. SMS and Tweets are all right in that sphere of activity but in the serious and the not so serious facets of the world, we need the softness of the “Comma” pause as opposed to the harsh “full stop”!

All this ‘love’ and ‘romance’ and softness have brought to my mind Valentine’s Day. It has been festering actually for the last one week! I get at least thirty SMS from various brands about what I can gift my Valentine, about the '50% off 'and sometimes 'up to 75% off 'on select merchandise, and not to forget the ways to send hints to my valentine for gifting ideas.

I think the first mention of this highly amorous day, in literature, was made in the fourteenth century by the father of English language Geoffrey Chaucer (Parlement of Foules -1382). It, of course, has its own little cameo in history and dates further down the line. I firmly believe it was fished out of the darkness of obscurity by the “Archie’s Greetings” as a major marketing ploy to distract the youth from their education and make their parents pay for all the vulgarly expensive gifts. How else can you explain the various “days” that are celebrated prior to the main day? The rose day, the hug day, the teddy day, the kiss day and ……..Each day has its share of cards and gifts to be bought.

The young people who are not at the receiving end are looked upon with pity and horror by the others. They go through acute depression and pangs of rejection. (Some parents are so scared that they send cards to their own children as secret admirers!) Numbers of suicide and murder cases are high during the week prior and after the ultimate day. The only positive thing about this is, hopefully it distracts the youth from indulging in marijuana (Which has been made legal in Colorado State!) and other such “elevating” experiences.

I feel a little apprehensive of the present generation. When we grew up, our crushes were private affairs. It’s not that there wasn’t romance; it was as present as it is now, only it was subtle and much more exciting (I wonder if each generation says that about their youth?) I do wonder what the excitement is in necking in public. The little exchange of glances can create a flutter in one’s heart. I do understand the high rate of divorce these days- the couples just get bored of each other. They know each other for five to six years before they marry and after that ennui sets in and it is time to part ways.

The youth argue that they are much more honest in their relationships then we were, but is that accurate and is that advisable? Romance is synonymous with mystery, if we know the ins and outs of another human being, what is the challenge to continue such an interaction? As human beings it is natural we search for new experiences, new discoveries to keep our intellects alive. The game of relationships is an interesting and time consuming activity. It is what separates us from animals.

Love is a wonderful emotion; it’s not fair to commercialize it. Valentine’s Day or a little note to be passed during class- let us keep it on the right level; let us not put a price on a beautiful emotion and inculcate the spirit of competition in every field of our lives. Some emotions are sacred, calming, serene and healing; let us take out the knives and forks from here as there is a possibility of getting hurt.

Both the “Comma” and “Valentine’s Day” celebrate fidelity in their work sphere, one to language and one to love. Both bring a pause to their work stations in their own way. The comma gives meaning and depth to the pause, while V day suspends our minds for at least ten days. One enhances the fluid dynamics of language; the other creates questions and doubts about the devotion of our partners. Do not inter either of them, they are both necessary to our existence and bring in the spice to an otherwise humdrum and bland life.

                                                                                                          

Cacophonic Neighbors

It all started with some taps on the roof and the whirring of the drill in the upstairs flat.

We had spent one year in harmony with all our upstairs and downstairs flat occupants when our quiet neighbors vacated the flat above and went forward in their own quest to excellence. We were friendly, had visited each other’s houses once and greeted each other with a ‘hi’ in the lift whenever we met. I did miss them but their absence did not stop the cog wheels of my life from moving. They had travelled a lot and so had I, so out of the twelve months, we must have occupied our respective houses for three months at a stretch. Nevertheless we shared a maid and I knew what was happening in their house and they would know what happened in mine!

Their absence was mourned by our maid in every conversation but life went on as quietly as before, for six months. Then just before the winter vacation I was informed that some new tenants had moved in, two unmarried sisters not in their first youth! They were “Directors” – so said my maid. I did not worry- what would two middle aged female bachelors do, anyway?

The sound of the taps grew a little louder over the week. I started seeing nuts and bolts on the ceiling and small hairline cracks appearing from nowhere! Then the deluge started, the balcony would be washed and all the water, following the law of gravity would fall into mine and I would have a short circuit in my mind and yell at the poor guards. It worked for some time; the washing was done stealthily during the afternoon when I had my nap!

Then came Friday! There was lot of activity- high heels tap tapping here, there and everywhere, lots of car parked outside the building and the blaring music began at seven in the evening. I thought indulgently – House warming party- shut all the doors (thankfully it was cool) and bore through all the drums, bass and altos! Put on the fan and ac full blast to drown out the noise and fell asleep.

It’s not “all’s well that ends well here”! The same thing happened next Friday but we were leaving on our vacation the next day so I did not bother to get too paranoid. After a long lovely vacation (I am sure you will forgive me for having forgotten the “sound blasting” neighbors) I returned to the humdrum of daily existence and soon a Friday came and with it our partying friend's out of tune songs! Then one more Friday and then we were given a reprieve of two weeks and then………

It was Tuesday, suddenly gushes of water fell outside the bathroom window but I ignored it. The moving of furniture started at about two in the afternoon. I did not pay much attention as it was a Tuesday. The day went on with the usual chores and being a cool night we had all the doors closed.

“Boom! Boom!” it started softly, but the tempo picked up, soon the whole house was vibrating with “musical noise”. It was eleven O’clock in the night! We went to bed but the clip clop of high heels coupled with furniture dragging and other strange noises made me feel that we were sleeping under a road on which horse carriages were being drawn (intermittent neighs of laughter and bellows of mirth punctured the night!)

It went from bad to worse! Normally a sound sleeper, I was wide awake and every time the beats beat the roof, my heart rate touched hundred! Irritation led to indignation to anger and then fury and I was at my wits end! I waited till twelve thirty but there was no easing of all the cacophony going on upstairs.

Furious I rang up the guard to tell them to stop it. He, poor thing, was apologetic and said he would inform them. It took another half an hour before the bass disappeared but the clip clops and the out of tune singing by varied male voices continued. It was two thirty in the night and the guys continued to sing at their worst- obviously drunk and inebriated.

The rule is, there can be no public noise after ten or eleven in the night. Even the pandals during Ganesh puja go silent but what about private houses? What rule is there for such nuisances where a few families or one family is affected?

Mumbai is no stranger to noise. We are bombarded throughout the day with noise from the traffic and construction work, the least anyone can do is to leave us in peace during the night! Once in a while to celebrate something is OK, we are indulgent but every weekend is a little too much! Lots of criminal intentions were going through my mind as I stomped about wide awake! Is this how crimes take shape?

Will someone advise me who to contact to stop such nuisance? I do understand that we cannot stop someone from doing whatever they want in their own house but there is something called social responsibility and I hope this stops before I go nuts and blast them both verbally and physically!

I miss my old neighbors now L. How sad that we cannot choose our neighbors!