Wednesday, March 18, 2026

The Perfect Half-Boiled Egg

 


For all my growing-up years, breakfast meant the same three things: bread, eggs, and milk. It was non-negotiable. An egg each morning was a ritual my father followed unfailingly, and continues to follow even now, nearing ninety.

I, however, never shared his enthusiasm. Poached eggs were far too gooey. Omelettes were worse, filled with offensively large chunks of onion. My mother, determined to get some protein into me, settled on the only remaining option: the boiled egg. I ate it with deep reluctance, so much so that if she was distracted, I would quietly slip it into the dustbin.

Years later, after raising two children and a husband (who comes from an egg-loving family) I have made my peace with eggs. Not entirely, but enough. Poached eggs remain a firm no. But scrambled eggs, cooked my way, vegetables chopped into near invisibility, fried until crisp, with a dash of soy, are something I genuinely enjoy. Omelettes are acceptable too, provided nothing inside them announces its presence. And boiled eggs? They are my fallback when I don’t feel like cooking.

My father, on the other hand, comes from a generation where men stayed out of the kitchen. Their culinary authority came not from experience, but from comparison, “My mother made it best.” But he always liked to think of himself as different. Naturally talkative, he gathered recipes and techniques from anyone willing to share, storing them carefully and building elaborate theories around them.

Over the years, he has explained to us (often in great detail) how easy it is to make rasgullas, how simple it is to make cottage cheese, how perfectly one can prepare sugar syrup. During his time in Malaysia, living with housemates after retirement, he even claimed to have made parathas from scratch. His repertoire is vast: roast chicken, baingan bharta, fish roasted over a campfire you’ve caught yourself. As children, we believed him unquestioningly. As adults, we began to understand that his knowledge is impeccable, but entirely theoretical. I realized that he is a theoretical physicist! The ingredients are right but following the method is dicey.

These days, life has slowed him down. A fractured leg, age, fading hearing; all have made him dependent in ways he never was before. He lives with my sister, who ensures he gets enough protein through the day. The highlight of his evening is still his egg.

But not just any egg.

For years, his breakfast egg was fried just so, the white crisp, the yolk soft and gelatinous. Hard-boiled eggs, therefore, are unacceptable. What he wants is a perfectly half-boiled egg.

Since he can no longer make it himself, he instructs the cook.

“The water must be boiling before you put the egg in.”

She nods, already thinking about how much milk she can spare for her tea.

“Boil it for exactly seven minutes.”

Another nod. Whether she owns a watch is doubtful, though she does have a mobile phone.

“Then take it out, put it in cold water, peel it, and bring it with salt and pepper.”

By now, she has left the room.

In the kitchen, she fills a pan with water, drops the egg in before it even warms up, and lets it boil for as long as it takes her to prepare her tea. The result is inevitable: a hard, grey, overcooked egg.



My father is disappointed. The yolk is no longer soft, it is solid, lifeless. He repeats his instructions the next day, and the day after that. Sometimes the cook changes, and the process begins again. But so far, the perfect half-boiled egg has remained elusive.

It must be frustrating that the person you are instructing lets all the sound bytes slip in and out of her ears without retaining even a miniscule amount of it. But the as we grow older and infirm we do get dependent on someone for something. It is less frustrating if we were to accept the imperfect world and its imperfect activities rather than whipping ourselves to try and reach a perfect destination

Perhaps the perfect egg is no longer the point.

Perhaps, in the end, it is about accepting the imperfect ones—the overboiled, unyielding eggs of an imperfect world—and learning, gently, to live with them.

 

 

 

Sunday, February 8, 2026

Honemoon, Selfie and Everafter

 

She stood on her tiptoes, turning her profile just so, lips pursed close to her new husband’s cheek. Her hair flowed freely in the soft zephyr over the calm ocean. A short, bright-yellow chiffon frock swirled around her well-proportioned figure. Her husband with ubiquitous knee-length shorts, tight T-shirt chosen clearly to show off his rippling muscles, stood a little stiffly until she prodded him to relax. Unobtrusively, she pulled his hand around her waist and lifted one leg in the universal pose of romance.

Are you wondering whether I have changed my genre from crime and ghosts to romance?


We were married thirty-six years ago, when public displays of affection were present but not common. I don’t think we had an official honeymoon either (though living alone in Mysore is a honeymoon in itself). We began taking “second honeymoons” only after our twenty-fifth anniversary and have continued for the last eleven years, as if to compensate for all those busy, non-celebratory anniversaries before.


As the years pass, I find myself shedding inhibitions like a strip-tease dancer. We make it a point to travel, and lately we’ve been indulging in cruises. My wardrobe has grown less stilted and far more energetic. (The knees may protest on long walks, but I insist on walking shoes that match my dress.)


The opening scene, however, was not us. It was a young couple we met on our most recent trip to Phuket via a cruise. We took a boat from the mainland to an island in the Straits of Malacca. It was a warm December day, and the boat held an eclectic mix: two honeymooning couples, two families of four, an elderly mother with a sulky youngish daughter, two athletic young men and us, the second (or rather, the twelfth!) honeymooners.


The journey took an hour and a half, filled with snacking, drinking, and indulging in every possible photo opportunity.


As is the wont of older people, I observed everyone and provided a running commentary to my long-suffering “lord and master” (who pretends to hate gossip). Being in a romantic frame of mind (it was our anniversary trip) I focused on the honeymooners and decided to write a mental thesis on them.

The first couple were openly, exuberantly in love. They tripped over each other trying to get the perfect pictures and enlisted every passenger at some point to help. We complied indulgently and happily. They were the very essence of newlyweds: gazing into each other’s eyes, holding hands, hugging whenever possible. The groom fetched cold drinks and snacks; the bride smiled, pouted, teased. Their affection was open and refreshing.

The second couple was different.


They too posed for photographs, but here it was the groom who took charge, perhaps too much so. He behaved like an excited boy, leaping at every beautiful sight, clicking away enthusiastically, though not at his wife. Instead, his lens focused on distant mountains, forests, and waterfalls.


The bride, like me, noticed the other couple. Unlike me, she was clearly put out. She tried repeatedly to divert her husband’s attention from the scenery toward herself. She succeeded briefly: he allowed a few posed photographs. But once the duty was done, he returned to the helm, DSLR in hand, absorbed in photographing the non-animate world.

I noticed this. So did she.

In her inexperience, she sulked and snapped at her bewildered new husband. She looked disgruntled, cast occasional glances at the other couple, and appeared ready to snap off her groom’s head as he obligingly photographed them.

We eventually reached the island, swam in the calm, unruffled sea, and frolicked like children let out of school.

The first couple splashed, cavorted, and romped in the shallow water against the golden beach, clearly having the time of their lives. The second bride sat at the water’s edge, letting gentle waves tickle her toes, while her untamed partner gambolled in the sea, camera held high above his head, still clicking away.

A couple of days later, we saw the second couple again, this time getting out of a cab. She wrestled with a large suitcase, yelling, “Come fast or we’ll miss the flight!” He paid no attention, peering instead through his DSLR at a hedge in bloom, clicking away happily.

I sometimes wonder which of these marriages will survive.

In these days of Instagram marriages and TikTok divorces, I’ve become cynical. The overtly romantic couple lived as though life were a movie—but would that film endure the long run? The impatient bride and her shutter-happy husband already seemed to have lost the first sheen of romance. Would he grow into her expectations? Would she learn to share his gaze?

Then again, why get married at all, if not for photo ops, petty tiffs, sulks—and the inevitable making up?