Lost and found.....

Rows upon rows of aisles! Very few people around but the anxious eyes sought every row and column looking for a tall thin man and his short little wife.  They would stand out as they are Indians but not a sign of them!  Desperate eyes pushing the filled trolley hoping against hope to find them soon. Two phone calls for moral support to hubby dear only to get calm logical advice which actually does not help in the face of panic! People had started looking curiously to see this lady going round in circles. “Calm down! Where would they have gone, not too far away”, said the ever practical mind but the panic stricken heart gave all sorts of arguments to nullify them.  After paying at the counter (still looking everywhere for a glimpse!)  The lady walked out and saw them waiting outside! Oh the relief!  As the tension ebbed out she could hardly stand on her feet but then life was on an even keel and the day went forward......

How the tables have turned! One day I was a little girl and they would be feeling the same thing that I felt that day!  Some decades ago they would have gone through the gamut of emotions which I went through that day! It’s good to have them around to show them that they have been successful in bringing up a responsible human being, to show them that they have been able to lead someone onto the right path.  Middle age is a strange platform, on one hand you are still leading a generation toward the right path and on the other you are helping another generation to kick the stones on their path and to smooth the kinks on the path of both the generation!

Someone said that love always goes downwards but I would beg to differ; I believe love is like the rays of the sun. It goes in all direction and is all encompassing. Giving light and heat and breathing life into the gloomiest of environments.  A great sage had said that you can reach ultimate happiness only when you leave behind all the attachments of the world. When you successfully cut the threads of “Maya” can you reach heaven said the ascetics of yore. Is happiness sitting in a temperature controlled environment and contemplating the beauty of nature (or heaven)? Does happiness exist without any problems, sadness or pain? Is happiness a state of mind where there is nothingness?  If it is then I think I will commit a few sins so that I do not go to heaven! I can come back, be reborn so that I can experience the rainbow palette of emotions, go through pain so that I appreciate pleasure. I do not want to be so good that I am bored with goodness.

What I want to ask is if I have reached the end of the road what do I do? The pleasure of having a goal is the journey towards it, not the destination! As a traveller I have picked up nuggets on my path of life sometimes they have been smooth and cool and sometimes they have been hot and sharp but the pleasure of knowing them and feeling them have been equally satisfying! When I look back there have been forks on the roads and a tinge of regret for “the road not taken” but definitely unhappiness has never shrouded me due to decisions. Every mistake I have made in life has taught me a lesson and I would not have it otherwise. 

I have met many people who get pleasure in pointing out that had you done that you would have been on a different plane (Mostly on a plane where a supposedly successful person is!) Yes possibly but would it have made me happy is the question. Happiness is an overrated emotion and I do know that there can be no pleasure if there is no pain and there can be no beauty if there is no ugliness. If you think happiness is equal to pleasure, beauty and goodness then I really think you should rethink your philosophy and do a little soul searching so that it’s not too late to achieve what you set out to! After all to itch also give relief, happiness and pleasure.