Acceptance

I have always tried to be very positive while I write here (though as people close to me know that I am by nature Negative!) but the last few days haven't been so good, so forgive me if a little bit of noir creeps in.

As usual I went about my day peeping at the sea whenever possible. ( It is important to nurture a fledgling love!) But by the end of the day I was on the bed feeling ill and nauseous not caring whether the sea was there or not just wanting to go to sleep.

After popping a number of medicines I did fall asleep. My sleep was peppered with dreams where I am chased by a lion, a snake and even a tsunami!(I have serious plans of teaching myself dream readings soon)But I woke up not any better and I moaned and groaned (My pain threshold being very low!)As the day progressed I felt a little able to pull myself up and nod my head about like a newly sprouted plant.

The lethargy which had enveloped me either due to the medicine or my body pushed me into bed and I lay there thinking about the uncertainties that are waiting to pounce on us round the corner.Here I was all gung-ho about how well I was feeling; loving every moment of my new life and bragging about it to anyone and everyone who was willing to listen!The next moment I was down in the dumps reflecting and contemplating on life!

Added to this the newspaper never lets us be happy anyway-making it a point to headline all that is going wrong in the world (When was the last time you had a lovely happy headline?)I watched old Hindi film songs(Black and white ones) and showed off my knowledge to Junu about the actors and the actresses, loved every moment of it -appreciated the lyrics and the lack of musical instruments but the richness of music in them but..... (put it down to my depressed state of mind) But all these people were dead- all these beautiful people were dead! Oh my God! What was the use of loving, hating or doing anything it will be all over in a few years!
I cried myself to sleep.

The day after I was still down but I had woken early and I sat in the balcony having my tea and looking at the deserted roads and looking at the sea crashing on the rocks-reflecting the state of my mind. Suddenly I felt a nip on my toe and I looked down to see a line of ants picking up the crumbs of the cookie I had been eating and in my pain I almost killed the little nipper but I desisted- It was the universe teaching me a lesson- A little ant dragging the huge cookie crumb not for himself for someone else and fighting his way through each obstacle not even scared of a giant like me. Not worried about life or death just living life to the fullest.

The Universe has a plan for all of us. Life is a gift; let us enjoy it, for time is very relative, in fact if we re-size ourselves to be relative to everything, then only the goodness remains and the sun rises everyday to dispel any darkness and the rain clears all clogged minds and the supreme power smiles with benevolence.

Accept that life is an amazing transition which has to experienced and appreciated with all its blacks, whites and the wonderful rainbow colors. So ENJOY!