Doubting Doubts and Roaring Roots

My potato has grown up now; has settled down; produced off-springs and is seemingly happy!

On another windy cold day I was surprised to see my potato sprouting green leaves and it hollered to me  so I went slowly (I am having a bad knee these days) towards it and cocked my head enquiringly .

“You know, I forgot to thank you for letting me take root here; amongst all these big plants; no one notices me and my family, so we are safe”

“You are welcome”, I said and waited

“Now that I have done what I wanted to do and I know that I am safe and happy here, and I am almost a grandfather, I am restless.” He said a shade darkly

“Well...”I didn’t know how to respond.

“It is said that when you save a person’s life you are responsible for it”, potato continued, “do something to help me now”, he continued on an insistent note.

“First thing is you are not a person”, I argued, “Second thing is there are millions of beings searching for their roots to garner peace and contentment and here you are with both these things given on a platter and you want to Move!”

“Bah! Roots!” he almost spat furiously, “They are nothing but chains that bind you within an imaginary wall. All this talk about blossoming when you find your roots is all humbug”

“Now! Now! That’s not the right attitude to take”, I said soothingly

“Finding roots is like killing yourself”, he continued, ignoring me. “Do you know that roots actually bind you to a place; limit you to certain parameters and actually kill your creativity and desire?”

“Whoa! Those are big words, think before you speak!” I said a trifle annoyed

The breeze was turning into a huge cloud of wind and I pulled the hood of my windcheater up and made as if to go inside.

“Don’t get me wrong”, Mr. Potato continued, “It’s not that I am not grateful for all you have done for me it’s just that I am in a doubting mood and I doubt everyone, even myself!”

I know where my roots are, but I feel, I have unconsciously negated it and tried to be as different from it as possible. I have never let down roots either; I have always been as restless as my friend and have never stayed long enough in a place to grow in! That does not mean that I have not grown or have had a stunted growth. There have been many a time that I have felt superior- that I know so much more than my local friends because I have shifted so many times. But there have been many a time when I have envied the settled aura around these people which I have never had.

Mr. Potato was not going to let me go, he was in a talking mood. “Yesterday I was contemplating the ‘ifs and buts’ of you not having rescued me”

“What did you conclude?” I asked

“You know I would have been kicked around a bit and then rotted and died, I suppose”

“Well Then?”I said triumphantly

“But it would have been exciting....” he mused, “who knows something exciting could have happened?”

“Yeah! Maybe Angelina Jolie would have picked you up and kissed you and you would have turned into a handsome young prince and she would have left Brad Pitt and been at your beck and call”, I said sarcastically

“Why not? It could have happened, why the doubt in your mind? The more I think the more I am sure it would have happened!”His eyes were shining in anticipation of his fantasy coming true!

I was so disgusted that I was ready to kick him! “What about, if I dig you out and throw you on the tiles here?”I said diabolically

The clever imp said, “That’s the problem, you can’t do that now”

“Why not?”I asked mulishly

“Now so many lives are dependent on me, it would be selfish to leave them and go chasing my dreams” he said smugly

“Escapist!”I muttered under my breath

“What’s that? What’s that?”Potato lisped loudly

“Nothing” I said, “Leave it...”

The sun had set; the city lights were all up and shining; the wind was furiously biting into me, both physically and mentally. I wished my erstwhile friend a subdued good night and walked back home.

Mind and heart were furiously at each other, hammer and tong! Each blaming the other; Roots versus movement; doubts versus surety; excitement versus safety; I realised I was a climber; I needed no roots; I needed strong walls or trees to support me as I climb over my dreams and mountains and reach for the sky.